Wacky China - Your Daily Fix of China's Weird News

In Guangzhou: A heavyweight wedding

From Chinaren's blog page: This week a mass wedding for women on the heavier side was held in Guangzhou, in the beautiful setting of the Pearl River's side. The blushing brides had been recruited from applicants from all over China who wanted to join in the ceremony. The weight requirement for those who wanted to join stipulated that the bride had to weigh at least 150 jin, (about 163 pounds, or as the rest of the world would say: 75 kilos).

The newlyweds said that they had participated in the ceremony to show support for overweight people and help them to get higher self esteem. They also said that being overweight does not make it harder to find love.

We think these curvy girls are supercool. And at least some netizens agree with us, comments from the blog:
"May they be happy!
"That's sad"
"The poor little husbands, how will they manage?"
"What will they do when the husbands are crushed to death?"
"They're very cute, I wish them well!"
"We should wish them well, everyone has the right to pursue a happy life"

Photo from the blog

Personals in Shanghai: It's a jungle out there

Once in a while, when we feel bored with our life in China, we take a peek at what's going on in Laowailand, that English-speaking expat-inhabited colony centering on pub streaks, gated communities and fancy coffee shops. One of the things the lonely inhabitants of China's Laowailand seek is casual sex...uhm...relationships. And what better way to find it than through ads. We had a look at Enjoy Classifieds personals, to see what's hot on the Shanghai meat market.

 

Waiting for that certain someone

Women seeking men

We must say we like the frank way some of these gals express themselves. For example the signature "looking for licker" who wants a man aged 30-50, who must also "know how to make woman come". (Well, we think that if a guy has reached 30, he ought to know). We were also intrigued by "pallyp" who tells us that she is: "Available to fulfil any fantasies you may have", (wow, even the  one about being an astronaut-superhero-firefighter?)  "Azumi" sets a higher standard: "Finally, sex is not enough, contact me only if you have some eccentric ideas, i am bored by life so i need something new". Hmmm.

Men seeking women

The men, on the other hand, seem a little less demanding, (or perhaps they just expect all women to know how to make them come). "Fallen_angel" only asks for: "a cute girl to shave my head", whereas "french_29" wants a "married woman (chinese or western) wiling to have a discreet relationship". 

Well, we hope they all find what they are looking for. We're off to play superhero-astronaut-firefighters.

Photo by nakuyou

Grad student seeks career as housewife

From the Sina blog: A female senior student in Jinan city, Shandong province has decided to look for a career as a full time housewife. With unemployment on the rise, marriage, apparently seemed like a better option. This week, the following ad was posted on an advertising billboard in Sinan: "Position wanted by female senior student: I hope to be destined to become your full time housewife. You must be younger than 40, have a local residence permit and your own career going."

Curios about this career move, a journalist decided to answer the advertisement and give the girl a call:

Reporter: "About this ad, can you explain it in more detail? I'm not sure I get it."
"Truth to tell, it's really an advertisement for marriage. Do you live up to the conditions I listed? Otherwise, there's no use calling".
Reporter: "Can you explain your conditions?"
"How much is your yearly income? Do you own an apartment in Jinan?"
Reporter: "It's several tens of thousands, I haven't got an apartment yet".
"Then why are you calling me?"
Reporter: "So there's no chance if I don't have an apartment?"
"At the moment it's so hard to find a job, if you don't have an apartment, where should I stay? I really don't have much of a choice..."

According to the blog post, this girl is not the only one who has opted for a husband as a way of making a living. Membership on dating sites for university students has soared, and a majority of the members are female.

Hmm...

Photo by escapethematrix

Magazine ranks China's best behinds

Chinese magazine 中国女人性感, (which in translation reads something like Sexy Chinese Women), have listed the top ten behinds of Chinese female celebrities. Thanks to Sina's blog page, we got access to this invaluable information as well.

The guidelines are as follows: "Perfectly shaped buttocks, like symmetric semicircles, without cellulite, like a pair of beautiful "honey peaches", is usually the standard for a good looking behind. Apart from these requirements, the butts in this list have another characteristic, they reveal the person's individual character".

Aaaaand The Winner Is: Musician Li Min.

"I think my behind is beautifully curved, since it's unusual for Asian girls to have such round forms", says Li Min. "Her butt looks really hot when she dances", says her fans.

In second place: Dancer Aduo

"Adou's sexy (electric) behind is worth admiring, not only because of its shape, but also its natural pose, it is really outstanding". 

In third place: Dancer Wen Lan

"Her hot way of dressing goes well with her sexy booty shake,  which drives people completely crazy".

To see the rest of the list (in Chinese, but you'll get the gist), visit Sina.

Our reaction: Honey peaches!?

Internet advice: if he hits you, he probably doesn't love you

So, it's time for more relationship advice. We found more invaluable knowledge about relationships on Chinaren's blog page. Today's topic: Ten signs that a man really has fallen in love with a girl. The poster begins with a rather saddening account of how she watches girls arrive in a crowded hospital to have abortions, without being accompanied by anyone. To avoid this, she offers some advice on how to choose a man who really cares. But how is a girl to know if a man loves her? Look for these signs:

1. He cares for and protects the girl
Men don't lack feeling, despite what women think. (...) Many men can fall deeply in love with a woman, and come to share her interests and care for her. This is something that really gives women a feeling of being cared for and protected.

2. He takes the initiative to visit her parents
Every man knows, if he wants to have a good relationship, he must have a good relationship with the woman's parents. Of course, most men might not want to visit their future in-laws, but they should do it for the woman's sake. Even if a man does not take the initiative, he should agree to go when the girl suggests it and not come up with excuses.

3. He makes friends with her friends

Even the most foolish men knows that it's worse to displease his girl's best friend, than her parents. Her best friend definitely understands her feelings better than her parents. Therefore, if you want to know how a man feels about you, look at how he treats your girlfriends. If he says: "I just want the two of us to be together, why be with other people?" then he is not just a fool, he doesn't love you.

4. He introduces her to his parents
Men are vain creatures, if they find a girl that they love, they like to show off their happiness. A man that loves you will definitely take you to visit his family and let them share his joy. If he doesn't do this, there can only be two reasons: 1) He already has a girl at home 2) He's only playing with you for a while and doesn't want to be serious.

5. He introduces her to his friends
If a woman wants to know if a man loves her, she just needs to look at how he introduces her to his friends. If he presents her as his girl, then he loves her. If he is unclear and says you are just friends, or just drags you away by the hand to meet them, then he has other things than love in mind.

6. He asks her to marry him
(...)
(Well, du-uh..)

7. He takes responsibility for her

When a man meets the right woman he can't help but feel responsible for her. This feeling has two sides, one is that he mentally feels that she is a part of him. The second side is psychological, he will feel that if he has "taken possession" of her body, then he should take responsibility for it. When a man acts responsible to a woman, he won't let her go out alone in to a crowded place to have an abortion, he would rather let her have the baby. If he let's her have an abortion, and doesn't even accompany her there, then he is definitely not acting responsibly.

8. He supports and helps her
If a man loves a woman, he will like to feel manly and help her out. To him she's a little girl who needs support and he will help her through troubles. He will not be intimate with her and then shrink from responsibility.  

9. A man will never hit a woman he loves

When a man loves a woman, he will never raise his hand against her, even if her temper is sometimes hard to deal with, he will be man enough to stand that and forgive her. Two kinds of men hit women: the first type just doesn't love the woman he's with. The second type is a sexist who doesn't understand love, he doesn't even love his family, only himself. These kind of men can't protect their women, they are like pet dogs who are only brave at home, but will stick their tail between their legs as soon as they go outside.

10. He is willing to make a few sacrifices

Many women say that men are the most selfish creatures in the world, but this is a mistake. If a man isn't willing to make sacrifices he really doesn't love his woman. If he really loves her, he'll be willing to compromise and make a few sacrifices for her.

My goodness, do we really need to be told this? Well, sadly, it seems like some of us do.

Photo by swanky, only an illustration